To Dip or To Drink? That is the Real Question

My kids love to dip things in ranch dressing. I am well aware that this makes them neither special, nor unique, in the realm of toddler/preschool land. Of course to me they are both divinely special and gloriously unique. But not because of their desire to coat their small bodies in ranch and wield carrots as swords... not that they would ever do that. :Þ 

Alrighty then...due to my children's predilection for dipping, I cringe every time I have to buy a bottle of ranch. Why you ask? Many reasons. Allow me to list them for you:

1. It can be loaded with gross things (MSG anyone? How about disodium phosphate? No? How about the crazy train my brain takes when I see "artificial flavoring". I go straight to the fact that Dr. Pepper used to contain ethylene glycol. Yes that is right. Dr. Pepper used to have ANTIFREEZE in it. I honestly cannot even think about what that "Artificial Flavoring" might be.)
2. It can be expensive even with the gross stuff in it. But to get the stuff that doesn't make me want to wrap my girls' digestive systems in protective wrap, yeah that just blows my budget. 
3. It's fattening. And the low-fat stuff has even more gross stuff that I cannot pronounce (Did you miss #1?). Not to mention that the low-fat stuff tastes...well...horrid. 
4. Use the powder you say? Even the powder has crazy gross stuff in it. 
5. I really think you should be convinced by now, but somehow having a list of 5 reasons seems more complete to me. (OCD Woman, Away!!)

Anyway I have been on  a mission for a while now to find a recipe that tastes really good, is easy to make, is free from chemicals that are not food, doesn't have 35000 calories per teaspoon, won't spoil in a day, and that my children (and husband) will actually like. Tall order, I know. 

BUT!!!! I found it. It is So. AMAZINGLY. GOOD. I could drink it. I won't, but I could. And just for you, Dear Reader, here it is. 

(OK. OK. It isn't totally low-fat. But I think it strikes a wonderful balance between full-fat tasty and low-fat healthy.)

Makes 1.5 QUARTS. That is a lot of dressing. 

Ingredients:

For the Mix:

1/4 Cup Black Pepper 

1 1/2 Cups Parsley Flakes 

1/2 Cup Garlic Salt 

2 Tbs Kosher Salt 

1/2 Cups Granulated Garlic 

3/4 Cups Granulated Onion 

2 1/2 Tbs Dried Dill weed

For the Dressing:

Juice from half a lemon

2 Cups Buttermilk

1 Cup Mayonnaise

2 Cups Non-fat Greek Yogurt

1/2 cups Sour Cream

What To Do:

1. Combine all mix ingredients and store in an airtight container. Pictured is a large peanut butter container. It filled it about 2/3 full. 
2. To make the mix into dressing, whisk together 3 T of mix with the remaining wet ingredients. 
3. Let sit for at least 2 hours. This gives the flavors a chance to develop. Before the 2 hour mark. It really just tastes like yogurt-mayo with green bits. Not tasty. But after the 2 hour mark:bust out the chicken wings and the carrot sticks. You are in for a treat.